Understanding Trust

Welcome back to Deb’s blog.

As I share my thoughts with you, it is important for you to know that I believe I am but one voice in a very large world. My perspective is my own. Your perspective is yours. When we share our strengths, purpose and values with each other it is an opportunity for each of us to grow our perspectives. I have been engaging in these kinds of sharing relationships with many people throughout my life. I wrote Trust: Understanding My Why to celebrate what can be attained when we fully invest in our relationships. A chance to create a better version of ourselves.

In a book that is about the power of relationships, why did I choose “Trust” as my leading force? What is trust? Why is trust a critical element to relationship-building? What are the conditions you need to have to put your trust in someone else? And as you think externally about trusting someone else, remember what may be most important is how do you evaluate and elevate your trust in yourself?

I built my trust in myself in several key ways. First, I was blessed to have people around me who trusted me until I messed up. For many people they have grown up having to prove themselves in order to win trust. The difference between those two starting points is critical and plays a huge role in one’s timeline to develop self-confidence, a precursor for trust. Second, I continually put myself in situations of risks. Whether it be in sport, school or business I am curious in ways that keep me seeking something new. That journey inherently creates both positive and negative experiences, or as I like to call them, opportunities for growth. Third, by dedicating myself to reflect on my experiences that questioned my strengths, purpose and/or values, I was consistently checking in with myself to keep my clarity about who I am and what I am willing to do or not do. That clarity validates my trust.

By trusting me, I can trust others. I have clarity about the behaviors that I am drawn to and those that push me away. Here are some of the qualities that open me up for building a trusting relationship: honesty, integrity, grounded, humble and the ability to be present. Being present is the ice breaker. Having someone fully engage with me as both a listener and sharer of ideas, is what all relationships need to be successful. So, if you want to launch a successful relationship, sleep your computer, silence your phone and sit eye to eye sharing thoughts. In those priceless moments you will have the greatest opportunity to discover a journey worth sharing.

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